Understanding autism
Autism is a developmental difference impacting the way individuals process, connect with and experience the world we all share. Because of these differences, autistic young people may need a different kind of support than other young people to navigate life’s challenges – including the challenges associated with pornography.
As a spectrum, autism is very diverse. There is huge variation among autistic people in the ways that our autism is reflected and experienced, with variations across things like language, perception and sensory experiences.
Autistic young people’s brains are usually wired to notice one thing – or a small, related group of things – at any one time. Connecting to or noticing something only happens fully when our attention is captured. Usually, autistic attention is triggered by interest. No interest means no attention! Often, we develop passionate interests that capture our attention – and we may develop a deep knowledge of those areas of interest.
Rapidly shifting our attention from one thing to another or focusing on more than one thing at once is very difficult. In autism this is called being ‘monotropic’. ‘Mono’ means ‘one’ or ‘single’, tropic means ‘channel’. If we think of being mono as a bit like a train running on a set track rather than a car which can change direction quickly we can understand how single track thinking will impact other ways of thinking.
Being Monotropic impacts on how autistic people perceive things as well as how they understand and experience their feelings and bodies. Autistic people also tend to be very honest, trusting and interpret things literally. This means that we tend to believe what we hear and see. This can set us up for believing scripted and acted scenes, as if they are real – which can then affect what we expect from others and what we think others want from us.
All these factors can add up to make it difficult for autistic young people to interpret what the people around them – in person or on screens – are thinking, feeling, doing or trying to communicate.
Young people, autism and technology
Technology is a big part of life for many young people, but autistic young people are often very drawn to technology, even more so than their peers. The ways young autistic people use and experience technology can impact – positively and negatively – on our wellbeing.
Technology can be a very useful tool for autistic young people. It offers ways to connect with others without the usual social and sensory issues meeting people in person may have. It can also be a great way of exploring passionate interests, and for some, technology is itself a passionate interest.
Although technology has all these great advantages, it also has a range of risks. And some of these risks can be increased when our brains are monotropic – including that we may find ourselves stuck in the technology, exposed to bullying, harassment, extreme violence and pornography, and even connected with people who may not have good intentions.
The way technology is designed to capture attention can be amplified by being monotropic. Working out what is real and what is ‘fake’ online can be challenging for anyone. But being trusting and literal can make autistic young people more vulnerable to misinformation, scams, and believing that what they see depicted online is what they should expect off screen, too.
Young people, autism and SEXUALITY
Autistic young people can experience their bodies, gender and sexuality in different ways. Because of these differences, autistic young people may need a different kind of support than other young people to navigate sexuality and relationships.
Historically, there has been a common assumption that some autistic young people will not be interested in relationships or sex. But this assumption leaves us at risk of negative experiences of sexuality, including sexual harm.
Some autistic young people may try hard to ‘mask’ our autism or our confusion about who we are, so we can fit in more with our peers. This can put autistic young people at risk of engaging in behaviours that we are not comfortable with, and that may be risky. For example, it can lead to difficulty recognising sexual boundaries and finding it hard to say ‘no’.
A lack of access to clear, age-appropriate sexuality education may increase the risk that pornography becomes autistic young people’s primary source of sexuality education. So, just like any other young person, autistic young people need access to information and education about relationships and sexuality. It needs to be clear, inclusive, developmentally-appropriate, and tailored to their needs so that it makes sense to them.
Young people and pornography: the new normal
Autistic young people can experience their bodies, gender and sexuality in different ways. Because of these differences, autistic young people may need a different kind of support than other young people to navigate sexuality and relationships.
In this world where we now often learn, work, play and connect online, pornography can be difficult to avoid. Young people may seek pornography out, but they are also being exposed to it accidentally. It’s not so much a question of if they will see it, as when.
The ease of access to pornography, combined with a lack of access to clear, age-appropriate sexuality education, means pornography has become a default sexuality educator for many young people. The messages conveyed in pornography can be a source of confusion and concern, and shape unrealistic and unhealthy sexual understandings and expectations.
Because mainstream pornography commonly portrays aggression, violence and unsafe sexual practices, its influence has serious implications for young people’s capacity to develop a sexuality that is safe, respectful, mutually pleasurable and consenting.
Parents, carers, teachers and other professionals need to understand how pornography is impacting on young people, how pornography’s influence may be amplified for autistic young people, and why we need to support them to navigate this new normal.
Young people, autism and The impact of porn
Pornography’s influence undermines healthy, respectful experiences of sexuality for young people in general, but these risks may be amplified for autistic young people.
As we have explored, autistic young people tend to be trusting and to have a very literal way of understanding people and the world around them: they are inclined to believe what they hear and see.
So, when autistic young people see pornography, they may find it particularly difficult to distinguish reality from fantasy and identify that the people in porn are ‘acting’ or pretending. They may believe it’s real.
When this tendency towards literal interpretations is combined with pornography’s failure to portray appropriate consent communication and its common depictions of gendered aggression and sexual violence, pornography’s influence puts autistic young people at increased risk of sexual victimisation. It also increases the risk that autistic young people may engage in sexual harm against others, by mimicking what they see in pornography.
It can be challenging for anyone with a tendency to be trusting and literal in their interpretations to understand that it is illegal and unethical to force someone to have sex, or to have sex with a family member or someone who is under the age of consent, when the pornography they have seen suggests that those things are normal, acceptable and even sexy.
Supporting autistic young people
As parents, carers, families, schools, communities and as a society, we need to help young people navigate pornography’s influence – and equip them with the skills they will need for a sexuality that is respectful, mutual, consenting and safe.
We need to talk with young people – including autistic young people - about:
the characteristics of healthy sexuality – such as respect, communication and consent – and what they look like in practice
building trust with people over time
signs that a relationship is not healthy – such as pressure, threats, or controlling behaviour like trying to limit our access to family or friends
keeping safe online – including not accessing illegal or degrading content and not sharing private information or images with anyone we don’t know well and trust
where and how we can seek help and support, and how important it is to do so.
NEXT STEPS
Porn Is Not the Norm has developed a range of resources designed to build an understanding of the interactions between autism, sexuality, technology and pornography.
To learn more about how you can support the autistic young people in your life to navigate pornography’s influence please visit our resources hub.
